Reading glasses, graying whiskers and male-pattern baldness — it’s the elderly vibe expecting parents want for their incoming little ladies.
Old man monikers are all the rage amongst pregnant mommies and daddies gearing up to welcome daughters in 2025, thanks to the “My Best Friend’s Dad” baby naming trend.
“I think we’ll start seeing more traditional male names being chosen for girls such as Drew, Noah and Dylan,” baby name consultant Colleen Slagen forecasted in a recent report.
The newborn know-it-all teamed up with UK nursery retailer JoJo Maman Bébé to pinpoint the most popular names-to-be of Gen Beta — bundles of joy born between 2025 and 2039.
“I used to get a lot of requests for gender-neutral names that lean feminine,” said Slagen. “However, now I get more and more requests for true ‘boy names’ for girls.”
“The biggest trend I see for 2025 is what I call ‘My Best Friend’s Dad’ names: Scottie, Tommie, Markie, Mickey, and Billie.”
Papa’s got a brand new bag, alright — and it’s light pink and full of diapers.
But some of those geezer guy names could mean bags of cash are in a baby’s future.
A new study commissioned by SEO pro Julian Goldie found that babies who grow up to become billionaires often have old-school names such as Thomas (nickname Tommie) and Mark (nickname Markie).?
“These classic biblical names claim the top spots for billionaire frequency,” read Goldie’s report, “perhaps suggesting there’s something special about these timeless choices.”
Laura Wattenberg, the founder of Namerology, agreed biblical names will be highly fashionable come time to change the calendar, and says conventional boy names such as Stevie, Scottie, Poppy or Murphy will be assigned to avant-garde little girls of the new year.
However, not all tried and true baby names will make it across the threshold and into the future, says Slagen.
“Many names that we would call boomer and millennial names are at risk of becoming extinct,” she warned. “Boomer names like Linda, Kathy, Karen, Gary and Bob are not being used as much.”
But don’t point and laugh too hard, Y2K kids.
“The same can be said for millennial names like Tiffany, Caitlin, Courtney, Greg, and Jeff,” said Slagen.