HAPPY Father’s Day, America’s dads. Once again, your services to the needy little ones who bear your genetic makeup have been rendered unnecessary.
I am in mourning today for a young Manhattan father who is willing to risk everything – his career, his finances, his reputation – to satisfy his fervent wish to raise his baby son.
At a time when so many men blithely shirk responsibility to their flesh and blood, and so many children grow up fatherless and confused, it was heartening to see Juan Campoverde, at the age of 20, trying his best to do the right thing.
As Campoverde tells it – and his version has gone unchallenged – in July 1999 he became the father of a little boy, Shiloh, by an ex-girlfriend who conspired with her mother to keep the child’s existence a secret.
It was only after the baby’s mother, Sabrina Morabito, gave Shiloh to a Poughkeepsie couple for adoption that Campoverde learned he was a father. And so Campoverde, a flight attendant, began a painful and costly legal fight to gain access to his flesh and blood.
It didn’t work.
An upstate judge told Campoverde to get lost. The Honorable Peter Forman of Poughkeepsie informed the young dad he is not entitled to know the son to whom he gave life.
So much for family values. So much for the value of a father’s love.
This pathetic tale plays out in Harlem and Poughkeepsie. But it could happen anywhere. Especially in New York state, where, by law, fathers have effectively been rendered superfluous.
As Campoverde tells it, his girlfriend broke up with him because he was six years younger than she. Then, with the help of her mother, she rebuffed his attempts to contact her at her Staten Island home.
Finally, Shiloh’s grandmother, stricken with remorse over her deception, told Campoverde the secret: He had a son.
Common sense might dictate that Campoverde’s ignorance of his child – and the mother’s active concealment of the boy’s existence – would result in a tearful meeting of blood relatives. Not so fast.
According to New York law, an unwed mother who puts her child up for adoption is not compelled to name the father. There is no requirement that any attempt be made to inform the dad his kid is to be handed to strangers.
Legally, he is unnecessary.
Still, a judge has the discretion to determine whether a parent should be given the opportunity to contest an adoption. In fact, the first adoption agency Sabrina Morabito contacted about handling Shiloh’s case refused to get involved unless the father was notified.
But in a particularly cruel ruling, Judge Forman decided Campoverde was at fault – for not thinking to ask his ex if she was pregnant!
Further, the judge said, Campoverde should have placed his name on something called the Putative Father Registry. Apparently, this is a list where men who believe they might be fathers sometimes put their names.
Campoverde says he never heard of such a list. I haven’t, either. Have you?
Little Shiloh is now more than 16 months old. He’s spent the last eight months with his adoptive parents in Poughkeepsie. I have no reason to believe they aren’t good people.
Forman insists Shiloh’s continued placement with these folks is in the child’s best interests. There is no examination of whether Campoverde would make a good parent. The judge made some vague reference to Shiloh’s mother feeling “threatened” by his phone calls. No details are offered.
By drawing out this case – I would be shocked if Campoverde didn’t appeal – the idiot judge has guaranteed a lengthy battle that is certain to threaten a growing boy’s well-being.
Campoverde should be commended. Not branded a villain for his paternal feelings.
But when laws and judges demonize fathers, it’s no wonder the family is in trouble.