1. Amanda Seyfried complains to Megan Fox she can’t get “Dancing Queen” out of her head.
2. Look – it’s Katie Holmes without a Scientology handler! Oh wait, that’s Tom with her.
3. Eva Longoria Parker pleads to join Heidi Klum and Kate Beckinsale in the mile-high club.
4. Mary Louise Parker is tired of being high.
5. Drew Barrymore and Amy Poehler yuk it up with the menfolk.
6. Jane Krakowski shows just how salty she is.
7. Winner of well, pretty much everything, Kate Winslet writes lines as penance for forgetting “that other one,” co-nominee Angelina.
8. “I’m just wondering if this mercury poisoning is contagious,” says Mark Wahlberg to the ailing Jeremy Piven.